YOU "BETA" BELIEVE IT!

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Have we tried naming kids after other cheeses or did we just stop at Brie?

Things we didn't do: Start the Fire, Sh*** the Deputy Things we did do: Built This City, Sh** the Sheriff Things we want to do: Break Free, Hold Your Hand Things we will do: Rock You, Survive, Anything for Love Things we won't do: That

How many chefs do you think were wrongfully exe***** in the medieval times because the King's food tester had a food allergy? Lmaoo aye man. These the type of questions I wanna see in my feed rather than those rent due tweets.

They want that cookie so effing bad forreal. I only JUST realized they are smiling bees, not very concerned tigers going

NOOOO! You can't just use A.I. to make us real! Yes, I can.

My grandfather at the age of 35. My at 35. My father at the age of 35.

Dogs when they do something wrong: Cats when they do something wrong:

The odds of being attacked by a cat with a tank are low but never zero.

What I thought a one million dollar home looked like when I was a kid. What a million dollar home actually looks like.

Ice ice baby! All right stop! Collaborate and listen. Turn around or get into a collision!

I had no business being down with O.P.P. in 1991.

The masculine urge to go to sleep in a nightcap and nightgown and snore like honk shoo honk shoo until being awoken by a noise and investigating with a little candle holder.

My grandpa got bitten by a spider and he was really upset so I went to get some ice cream, but before I could leave the room I heard him say

Watching people I know sm*** the devil's lettuce, after we signed a D.A.R.E. pledge in the 6th grade.

Me, working my 9-5, while he shows me the Pokemon he named after me on his switch

Me: *breathes* My parents: Useless Man. This man contributes absolutely nothing to society! Lazy, unwashed, programs in Java

All insects have three main body regions: the head, the abdomen, and the

The Simpsons have done it again

Kids these days will never know how serious field day was.

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